Page 1 of 10 123 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 50 of 478

Thread: Objectophilia - Sex with Benches, Tables, the Eiffel Tower and more...Oh my!

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    1,418

    Objectophilia - Sex with Benches, Tables, the Eiffel Tower and more...Oh my!

    http://www.nbc24.com/news/news_story.aspx?id=114123

    I really don't care about anyone's sexual preference.. but I wonder if this guy was using potato salad as a lubricant.. and spreading honey on his buns for the ants to join in on the picnic .. just for that added touch of kink.

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    San Antonio
    Posts
    30,597
    I fucked a mound of dirt in the woods once.
    Suck it.

  3. #3
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    21,462
    LOL
    .

    La di da, la di da, la la.

  4. #4
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    1,418
    Any locust hole in a storm....

  5. #5
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Hot dog rapes table.
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  6. #6
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Connecticut
    Posts
    794
    Umm, hmmph..I dont think I have words for this one...lol

  7. #7
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Geelong, Australia
    Posts
    17,979
    Some of those tables got nice legs.
    I am a sick puppy....woof woof!!!

    Carping the living shit out of the Diem. - Me!!
    http://www.pinterest.com/neilmpenny

  8. #8
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Mustang, Oklahoma
    Posts
    10,073
    Reckon thats why they call it a woody.

  9. #9
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Quote Originally Posted by ichabodius View Post
    I fucked a mound of dirt in the woods once.
    I've fucked a few mounds of dirt, too; some of 'em were wearing cowboy boots.
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  10. #10
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    In the leaves
    Posts
    1,099
    He should have just stuck with the inside table. That way, he wouldn't be in jail.
    I don't give a fuuuuck what inanimate objects someone fucks. I just don't want them using mine.
    <a href=http://www.findadeath.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1056&dateline=1232680113 target=_blank>http://www.findadeath.com/forum/imag...ine=1232680113</a>

  11. #11
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Quote Originally Posted by neilmpenny View Post
    Some of those tables got nice legs.
    LOL.
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  12. #12
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    In the leaves
    Posts
    1,099
    Quote Originally Posted by cindyt View Post
    I've fucked a few mounds of dirt, too; some of 'em were wearing cowboy boots.

    *snicker*
    <a href=http://www.findadeath.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1056&dateline=1232680113 target=_blank>http://www.findadeath.com/forum/imag...ine=1232680113</a>

  13. #13
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Quote Originally Posted by cleanskull View Post
    Reckon thats why they call it a woody.
    ROTFL
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  14. #14
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Home of the Flaming Koresh
    Posts
    1,649
    Wow wonder if he got any splinters ?
    If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him?


    Hag O' Death

  15. #15
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Earth
    Posts
    21,462
    Quote Originally Posted by cindyt View Post
    I've fucked a few mounds of dirt, too; some of 'em were wearing cowboy boots.
    LOL
    .

    La di da, la di da, la la.

  16. #16
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Wichita Falls,TX
    Posts
    4,326
    I bet the splinters were a bitch...

  17. #17
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Geelong, Australia
    Posts
    17,979
    Quote Originally Posted by ad nauseam View Post
    Snip....
    I don't give a fuuuuck what inanimate objects someone fucks. I just don't want them using mine.
    You have an inanimate object? Poor you.
    I am a sick puppy....woof woof!!!

    Carping the living shit out of the Diem. - Me!!
    http://www.pinterest.com/neilmpenny

  18. #18
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Concord , California, United States
    Posts
    6,968
    The funniest friggin shit happens in Florida and Ohio .....

  19. #19
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    London, Ontario, Canada
    Posts
    5,353
    ill bring the picanik basket Booboo
    dont tell the ranger

  20. #20
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    In the leaves
    Posts
    1,099
    Quote Originally Posted by neilmpenny View Post
    You have an inanimate object? Poor you.
    That's what my husband said.
    <a href=http://www.findadeath.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1056&dateline=1232680113 target=_blank>http://www.findadeath.com/forum/imag...ine=1232680113</a>

  21. #21
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Geelong, Australia
    Posts
    17,979
    Quote Originally Posted by ad nauseam View Post
    That's what my husband said.
    I am a sick puppy....woof woof!!!

    Carping the living shit out of the Diem. - Me!!
    http://www.pinterest.com/neilmpenny

  22. #22
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    1,418
    hahaha you guys are too much.. I actually have tears in my eyes from laughing

  23. #23
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Collierville, TN
    Posts
    666
    Ich, Neil, Ad and Skull?

    I fuckin' love readin' your posts! New classics every time.
    If I stand on top of the toilet, does that mean I'm high on pot?

  24. #24
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Quote Originally Posted by Dying Breath View Post
    hahaha you guys are too much.. I actually have tears in my eyes from laughing
    Great thread, good times.
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  25. #25
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Idaho
    Posts
    3,487
    Quote Originally Posted by ichabodius View Post
    I fucked a mound of dirt in the woods once.
    Somehow this does not surprise me.

    Quote Originally Posted by Queen_Death_Hag View Post
    Wow wonder if he got any splinters ?
    LMFAO!

    He tilts the metal round picnic table on its side and lays up against it and has sexual intercourse with the table.
    How do you have sexual intercourse with a table? Doesn't the act of sexual intercourse include some kind of penetration? Never mind, I don't want to know. Where do these people come from?!? This is an anti-gay marriage person's worst nightmare. "Look out! You give them gays the right to get married, next people will be marrying their picinic tables!"

  26. #26
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    1,666
    Quote Originally Posted by cleanskull View Post
    Reckon thats why they call it a woody.
    That's freakin' hysterical!

  27. #27
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Johnny Cashville
    Posts
    22,611
    Did you read the comments underneath the story? LOL

    "
    Offspring?

    I wonder what the kids would look like?
    — Rick James, Anywhere, USA

    Charged


    I found out what the charges were against this guy. 6 counts of being awesome!
    — N M, Cincinnati
    ryan lunn

    that comment from ryan lunn from mason was horrific. I can't believe someone would even joke about this kind of thing. A man like that needs as much therapy as the man who got caught. I bet ryan lunn has tried something just as gross and horrible as that. what has our world come to, its all falling apart.
    — gretchen miller, cincinnnati, oh

    Table Love


    There is nothing wrong with consensual sex between a man and his table. I do warn you to remove any glass tops as this severely scarred Ryan.
    — Lunn's Table, Mason, Ohio

    Sweet


    Hey people don't knock it until you try it!
    — Ryan Lunn, Mason, OH
    man having sex with picnic table

    I'm not really sure, who is more sick in the head, the man performing sex with a picnic or the sick person that's doing the video tapping???
    — debbie smith, toledo, ohio

    WTF?


    You can't blame NBC24 for airing it...who is the sicko with the DVD's???? Who would actually sit there and watch him hump a table? It's always better to know who the pervs are and where they live.
    I'm glad I know...just when I thought I have heard it all!!!!
    — Jenn Ewwwwww, Toledo, Ohio

    You don't mess with friggin Dave Coulier click here to mess

  28. #28
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    BTown
    Posts
    27,241
    Quote Originally Posted by RaRaRamona View Post
    Did you read the comments underneath the story? LOL

    There is nothing wrong with consensual sex between a man and his table. I do warn you to remove any glass tops as this severely scarred Ryan.
    Lunn's Table, Mason, Ohio
    Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
    Do not knock on Death's door. Ring the bell and run. He hates that.

    For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ: for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek. Romans 1:16


  29. #29
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Johnny Cashville
    Posts
    22,611
    This one is my personal fave


    Charged

    I found out what the charges were against this guy. 6 counts of being awesome!

    You don't mess with friggin Dave Coulier click here to mess

  30. #30
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    In the leaves
    Posts
    1,099
    Quote Originally Posted by RaRaRamona View Post
    This one is my personal fave


    Charged

    I found out what the charges were against this guy. 6 counts of being awesome!
    that is the best. a+++
    <a href=http://www.findadeath.com/forum/image.php?type=sigpic&userid=1056&dateline=1232680113 target=_blank>http://www.findadeath.com/forum/imag...ine=1232680113</a>

  31. #31
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    1,085
    Ten years ago a woman in our area swore she contracted HIV by sitting on a picnic table. This actually made our local paper and many people believed it !!!!!!!!!

    Of course not long afterward, the woman's family told the press she had just been released from a local mental hospital. It figures !!!

    The woman killed herself two years later.

  32. #32
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    San Antonio
    Posts
    30,597
    Quote Originally Posted by Cathy J. View Post
    Ten years ago a woman in our area swore she contracted HIV by sitting on a picnic table. This actually made our local paper and many people believed it !!!!!!!!!

    Of course not long afterward, the woman's family told the press she had just been released from a local mental hospital. It figures !!!

    The woman killed herself two years later.
    Those Gays, Haitians, and Picnic Tables. They aughta do sometin bout em!
    Suck it.

  33. #33
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Johnny Cashville
    Posts
    22,611
    Quote Originally Posted by Cathy J. View Post
    Ten years ago a woman in our area swore she contracted HIV by sitting on a picnic table. This actually made our local paper and many people believed it !!!!!!!!!

    Of course not long afterward, the woman's family told the press she had just been released from a local mental hospital. It figures !!!

    The woman killed herself two years later.
    Maybe the table broke up with her & she was depressed? Seriously that is sad. I never eat on picnic tables. People have sex on them all the time. Like at night. I am so serious. I won't tell you how I know this.

    You don't mess with friggin Dave Coulier click here to mess

  34. #34
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    1,321
    I just read this story on a news site, and ew ewww ewww EWWW EEEEWWWW !!!!

    I mean, gah!
    Goodbye Porpoise Spit!


  35. #35
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    San Antonio
    Posts
    30,597
    Well, next time your at a public park just don't eat anything thats fallen off your paper plate. It might have a secret sauce. Actually its more likely to have blood or feces but we'll stick to the topic here. (Like the dudes member was stuck to the table with man-goo..... sorry guys)
    Suck it.

  36. #36
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Johnny Cashville
    Posts
    22,611
    Um ya we gotcha there Ich don't feel like you need to over explain yourself.

    You don't mess with friggin Dave Coulier click here to mess

  37. #37
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    San Antonio
    Posts
    30,597
    I'm very descriptive. Can't help it.
    Suck it.

  38. #38
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Oklahoma
    Posts
    1,418
    S'mores.. not your fathers oldsmobile....

  39. #39
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    San Antonio
    Posts
    30,597
    Mmmm. Smores. GGLLLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUHHGHHHHH!!!!!!!
    Suck it.

  40. #40
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Denver
    Posts
    1,085
    Quote Originally Posted by RaRaRamona View Post
    Maybe the table broke up with her & she was depressed? Seriously that is sad. I never eat on picnic tables. People have sex on them all the time. Like at night. I am so serious. I won't tell you how I know this.
    I dont eat on picnic tables either. between bird droppings and...the other stuff YUCK !!

    For years we had a park that was opened 24 hours and many people were busted having sex there at night, lots of picnic table sex..and playground sex too. However most of those who were busted were STRAIGHT couples !!!!

    I still remember our paper interviewing this middle aged married couple who was busted having sex at 2am in the park, "...we wanted to try something new" LOL

    Today the park closes at sunset.

  41. #41
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    San Diego County
    Posts
    29
    This was all a big misunderstanding, he was asked to come TO the table!

  42. #42
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Idaho
    Posts
    3,487
    Quote Originally Posted by RaRaRamona View Post
    People have sex on them all the time.

    And with them!

    Quote Originally Posted by Dying Breath View Post
    S'mores.. not your fathers oldsmobile....
    Eeeeeeeeeeeew! lol

    Quote Originally Posted by Peter View Post
    This was all a big misunderstanding, he was asked to come TO the table!

    I just snorted! I haven't seen you around much Peter but I like you. That's awesome.

  43. #43
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    San Diego, CA
    Posts
    1,875
    BELLEVUE, OH --Police say a man was arrested after being caught on a DVD and has admitted to having sex repeatedly with his picnic table.
    Wait so...

    He got freaky with a DVD too!?!?!?

    Does the madness NEVER end?
    Last edited by Boxofpandoraz; 03-29-2008 at 12:11 AM.
    <3 Rest Well, pvezz. <3

  44. #44
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    la la land
    Posts
    199
    Quote Originally Posted by cleanskull View Post
    Reckon thats why they call it a woody.

    LOL........some people...

  45. #45
    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    hermitville, USA
    Posts
    475
    A Gigi would've been much more discreet and less painful:
    http://yourpassionconsultant.com/con...y/forhim01.php

    Years ago when I was still living in Texas, I was hanging out at a friend's house with his boyfriend. My friend came crashing through the door (as he always made grand entrances) and asked his boyfriend if he had told me about the motel. My friend then proceeded to tell me there was this free-for-all cruising spot where people would have sex in public while others would go to gawk. Apparently the night before he witnessed a very large woman have sex with a very skinny man. My friend then basically herded us into the car so I could see this anonymous hook-up in action. We got to the motel and other cars had parked there waiting for that evening's show as well. And what did we get? Nothing. My friend was very disappointed, as was I since I was up for a good laugh.

  46. #46
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Scotland
    Posts
    1,607
    Quote Originally Posted by Dying Breath View Post
    http://www.nbc24.com/news/news_story.aspx?id=114123

    I really don't care about anyone's sexual preference.. but I wonder if this guy was using potato salad as a lubricant.. and spreading honey on his buns for the ants to join in on the picnic .. just for that added touch of kink.
    Despite being very funny, it is still gross! Poor picnic table, lol!

  47. #47
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    6,229
    Quote Originally Posted by gleemonex View Post
    A Gigi would've been much more discreet and less painful:
    http://yourpassionconsultant.com/con...y/forhim01.php

    Years ago when I was still living in Texas, I was hanging out at a friend's house with his boyfriend. My friend came crashing through the door (as he always made grand entrances) and asked his boyfriend if he had told me about the motel. My friend then proceeded to tell me there was this free-for-all cruising spot where people would have sex in public while others would go to gawk. Apparently the night before he witnessed a very large woman have sex with a very skinny man. My friend then basically herded us into the car so I could see this anonymous hook-up in action. We got to the motel and other cars had parked there waiting for that evening's show as well. And what did we get? Nothing. My friend was very disappointed, as was I since I was up for a good laugh.
    They have bars/clubs like that in San Francisco.

  48. #48
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    2,258
    Quote Originally Posted by ichabodius View Post
    I fucked a mound of dirt in the woods once.
    Hahaha!



    Ich your insane!


    -Morbid1

  49. #49
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    12,281
    Pool tables don't talk.

  50. #50
    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    2,258
    Quote Originally Posted by pvezz View Post
    Pool tables don't talk.
    And the height is just right!




    -Morbid1

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •